How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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