Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
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