That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
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