i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Randomize
