idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
