Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
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