real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize