There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
