I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Randomize
