yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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