god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
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