whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
