Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
