you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
