just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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