u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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