So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
