her vagine was all disorganized.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
how does that bad decision feel?
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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