like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Randomize
