I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize