i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize