I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
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