puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize