Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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