Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize