I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Randomize
