HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
