google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
it glows. i had to have it.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize