she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize