he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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