I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize