North Korea, Best Korea!
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize