Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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