he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
