Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize
