Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Randomize
