JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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