My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Randomize