So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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