im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
I currently don't understand fingers.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
