you turned your livingroom into a bong?
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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