Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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