I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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