my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
