I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Randomize
