Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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