i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize
