I wannas sexs uuuuu
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
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