i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Do vagina's smell?
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Verdict: uncircumcised.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize