I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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