I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
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